The Fear of Change and How It Can Impact Our Psychological Health

Date: Oct 4, 2023 Duration: 40:13 min
Change is hard and it can impact our psychological health. We all have expectations and plans of how we want things to go, and change can make us feel like we are losing control of that. When change disrupts our comfort zone and challenges us, it can force us to look at ourselves in a new light, which can lead to anxiety, fear and negative self talk. The truth is that being scared of change is completely normal, and talking to people about how you feel and why you are scared and anxious can help you see things from a new perspective. Life is filled with change that can reinforce or challenge who we think we are, but as long as we are kind and understanding with ourselves through the challenges, they can help us grow stronger and more resilient.
Society has led us to believe that therapy is for those with deep-seated issues and that it’s not for those of us who are “successful and stable”. The Therapy: Deconstructed podcast, hosted by Dr. Bonnie Wims, debunks the myths and societal beliefs about therapy and explains not only what therapy is, but also how it can help anyone who’s facing obstacles in their lives.As a therapist, coach, and a UK Chartered Counseling Psychologist specializing in helping the global community, Dr. Bonnie has helped innumerable people get from where they are to where they’d like to be. She’s “your someone else” who is there for you when you need to bounce things off of so that you can better understand yourself. And she does it in a warm and intelligent style that’s peppered with levity.Listen in each week to Dr. Wims if you’re therapy-curious and get answers to all your questions about what therapy is, what it is not, and how therapy may be the x-factor you’ve been searching for.Show notes:
🌀 Changes are very hard: changes impact our sense of happiness and comfort. 01:32
🇬🇧 Moving to the UK: first reaction of an eight-year-old who had a map of his future life in mind. 02:30
👦 Anxiety was born in Jesse: becoming introverted, OCD, and hating for change. 05:20
🏡 When home is just one place in the world.  08:59
🤯 Nostalgia and wrapping up our identity into external factors: moving back to the USA was even harder. 11:37
😩 Scared to let people in: being scared to talk to people and the need for therapy. 16:31
👉 When circumstances are very difficult, it has nothing to do with your capabilities: harsh self-talk and self-bullying. 19:00
🤫 Young men want to fix things themselves: rejecting conversations or not getting deep enough. 21:21
⚠️ Sometimes life is hard but talking about it can help. 23:07
😇 Thriving journey: starting to talk and showing authenticity released Jesse’s confidence.  24:57
🎯 We often define ourselves as too small: the importance of being flexible in how you define yourself. 27:42
😇 Daily things challenge who we think we are: self-discovery and personal growth are on every corner. 29:19
🛌 Loneliness and identity crisis in various cities: the first night is the hardest. 32:44
🌞 Using “if-then” sentences in therapy: separating yourself from your feelings. 35:24
🤩 The importance of recognizing what you are saying to yourself in times of change. 37:20

What Listeners Are Saying


Every month, I look forward to a new episode of Therapy Deconstructed. The way Bonnie weaves her own story through the episodes is captivating. She has a calm and nurturing voice, like the trusted friend you always turn to when you need solid advice. I always finish an episode feeling like she was talking directly to me.

Thomas MacInnes

As someone who had never gone to therapy, I found myself in a situation last year that was very sad, confusing and overwhelming for me and I was really unable to figure my way through it. I turned to Bonnie and she so graciously and effortlessly (seemingly) had so much empathy and compassion for my feelings and she truly helped me navigate getting my emotions and really my life back on track. I am very grateful for Bonnie and her wisdom, honesty, humor, candor but mostly for her compassion. I’m excited to listen to her podcast but would highly encourage anyone who is reading this to reach out to her. She really helped me and I am very thankful to have her in my corner.


Dr. Wims makes therapy digestible and even fun to learn about. Sometime therapy feels like a big mystery and something super intimidating, but she breaks it down make it feel more personal and helpful.


I’m pretty particular about what podcasts I’ll tune into, but this one was recommended so I decided to check it out. Bonnie is a natural at this – she offers thoughtful insights into our thoughts and emotions and why we humans fall into unhelpful patterns, then provides simple wisdom on how to reframe them. Big fan.

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