The Best Version of Me

2021-07-12T14:09:34+00:00

I’ve always said that I learn as much from my clients as they do from me.  The insights people share with me as they work on their mental health often inspire me and I believe help me to improve as a psychologist and a person.  But ever so often people will share their dreams and goals and what they aspire to change and it also motivates me to take a look at myself and how I’m doing with my own mental wellness.  Although it is communicated in many different ways, I often hear a statement like, “I want to be [...]

The Best Version of Me2021-07-12T14:09:34+00:00

Out Of Your Comfort Zone

2019-11-05T21:28:42+00:00

Brene Brown describes the phrase “comfort zone” as “where our uncertainty, scarcity, and vulnerability are minimized-where we believe we will have access to enough love, food, talent, time, admiration.  Where we feel we have some control.” When described like that, it is no wonder that we don’t like to leave this special place called the “comfort zone”.   Why would we intentionally challenge ourselves to move beyond where we feel we are safe and loved?   Lately I’ve been feeling challenged by a few things and my anxiety is telling me to stay clear of anything new.  I have pages full of [...]

Out Of Your Comfort Zone2019-11-05T21:28:42+00:00

It Doesn’t Mean Anything

2019-10-15T20:06:51+00:00

It’s Just Not Fair Have you ever said those words to yourself?  Maybe a relationship you cared about ended without warning?  Maybe you lost a job or didn’t get a promotion? Or maybe you just had some bad luck and despite your hard work something failed miserably?   We can struggle during these times and we tell ourselves that it shouldn’t have happened to us because we tried really hard, or we are a nice person and we had the best intentions, or even that we just felt like we finally deserve a break! However, the real challenge starts when we [...]

It Doesn’t Mean Anything2019-10-15T20:06:51+00:00

Breakups Top Tip #7 Lessons Learned

2019-07-31T02:27:30+00:00

My first boyfriend was 6 years older than me and everyone loved him.  My family thought he was good for me because he was stable and kind. My friends were jealous because where their boyfriends were immature kids, my boyfriend lived on his own with a stable job.  He was all of these things and more. He was stable, he was kind and he was mature. He would take me shopping and he loved nothing more than to buy me a new outfit. He had a second car that was a volkswagon bug and he patiently taught me how to [...]

Breakups Top Tip #7 Lessons Learned2019-07-31T02:27:30+00:00

Top Tip #6 Take Care of Yourself

2019-07-30T01:56:17+00:00

Immediately after a break up it is very common for us to go through a difficult time.  We may feel stunned and disconnected from reality a bit. We may find our passion for things is greatly reduced.  We may not feel excited about things as much and notice our energy level is much lower than normal. People describe wanting to sleep more, not sleep at all, drink more, eat more or not eat at all, and a loss of interest in day to day activities. On paper these symptoms mirror depression in many cases.  For most of us these feelings [...]

Top Tip #6 Take Care of Yourself2019-07-30T01:56:17+00:00

Breakup Tip #5 Unhelpful Inner Voice

2019-07-28T21:26:45+00:00

We all have that internal voice that speaks to us.  Sometimes it can be helpful and be a guiding force in what choice to make in a situation.  Other times it can be a running dialog of unhelpful chatter in our head that keeps us from making a decision.   Is your internal voice filled with negative and judgmental statements about you?  Are you thinking about all of the ways that you screwed up or didn’t live up to expectations?  I don’t know about you, but my internal voice at 2am is frequently quite negative and unhelpful.  It confuses me, plays [...]

Breakup Tip #5 Unhelpful Inner Voice2019-07-28T21:26:45+00:00

Breakup Tip #3 Acceptance

2019-07-27T01:37:37+00:00

Change is hard at any time.  We tend to avoid it because it brings up our insecurities and can require large amounts of confidence.  When we are contemplating making a change we may question our ability to handle the change we are considering.  A new job, a move, and even a hairstyle change can provoke anxiety. So add change into the mix when we are going through a breakup and we can be frozen and indecisive.  Most of us aren’t feeling our most confident or secure when a relationship is ending. We can vacillate between thinking we are doing the [...]

Breakup Tip #3 Acceptance2019-07-27T01:37:37+00:00

Is it Happiness I am looking for?

2019-04-21T20:19:43+00:00

I woke up happy today.   The feeling of excitement and possibility mixed with a dash of contentment was humming inside my chest when I opened my eyes today.  As I made coffee the feeling continued, making the chore effortless. As the milk warmed and I heard the steady stream of coffee percolating, I took a deep breath and enjoyed the moment.   But then my mind started to work.   You know that revving up of the engine that is our brain as it begins to think about what you have to do today, what you didn’t get done [...]

Is it Happiness I am looking for?2019-04-21T20:19:43+00:00
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